Alexander Palace Forum

Discussions about the Imperial Family and European Royalty => Alexandra Feodorovna => Topic started by: investigator on April 08, 2004, 04:27:16 AM

Title: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: investigator on April 08, 2004, 04:27:16 AM
What sort of relationship did Alexandra have with her sisters-in-law?
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: Greg_King on April 08, 2004, 05:42:25 AM
With Olga Alexandrovna there was quite a bit of closeness and trust, and they seem to have got on well together.

Alix and Xenia Alexandrovna were rather close, at least as confidants while corresponding, before her marriage to Nicholas, and also in the first few years of his reign.  Olga Nikolaievna and Irina Alexandrovna often played together as children.  In time, though, this relationship became rather strained, and Xenia took up for her mother, which set her at odds with Alix; Olga Alexandrovna, not being particularly close to her mother, remained much closer to Alix.

Xenia and Sandro (the latter especially) seem to have harbored the idea that they would have some influence over Nicholas, but it was Serge and Ella who, in the first decade of his reign, probably had more influence.

After the Revolution, Olga as far as I can tell never said anything mean spirited about Alix, whereas in exile Xenia was full of venom, complaining to any number of people that Alix "had made a rag out of Nicky" and blaming her for everything that had happened.

Alix's relations with Ducky, Ernie's first wife, were never terribly good; when Ducky married Kirill Vladimirovich, Alix forced herself to associate with her, as she had to do so.  There are, however, several instances later, during the War, when they seem to have come to some kind of understanding, though that crumbled away in the months before the Revolution.

The relationship with Grand Duchess Eleonore of Hesse, Ernie's second wife, was much easier in all respects.  Alix adored Ernie, and appreciated Onor's care of him.  There are a number of particularly warm letters between them.

Greg King
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: Janet Whitcomb on April 26, 2004, 05:50:59 PM
Yes, and add to that the contrast between Nicky's softspoken personality vs. the "blowhard" nature of Grand Duke Alexander.  Here was a very forceful "I-told-you-so" sort of person who had ideas about everything!

I'm also sure there was a great deal of comparison, right from the start and continuing through their girlhood and adolescent years, when it came to Olga and Irina.

But Xenia giving birth to all those sons, contrasted with Alix having nothing but daughters--until Alexei, and then he turns out to be ill--must have been the worst.
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: Lass on June 15, 2005, 04:41:44 PM
They were supposed to have been good friends in their earlier years, corresponding apparently under the names "chicken" and "hen". Was it Rasputin's influence or was it unfriendliness on the part of the Empress that spoilt the relationship?...Or what else?
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: Sarai on June 19, 2005, 01:46:12 PM
Lass, there are some answers to your question in this thread on Xenia:
http://hydrogen.pallasweb.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.cgi?board=family;action=display;num=1098127605
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: Lass on June 20, 2005, 05:55:29 AM
Thanks; that's a good thread.
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: lovy on January 18, 2006, 10:43:21 PM
I remember Xenia saying of Alix: "That woman has made a mess of my brother, Nicky." Or something very much like that.
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: imperial angel on January 19, 2006, 10:11:13 AM
I think Xzenia said something like that in exile, years later, when she was old. Alexandra certainly never really connected with some of her inlaws or they with her.
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: grandduchessella on January 19, 2006, 04:56:58 PM
Really most of her in-laws--even those she got along with didn't seem to be in her innermost circle at all. Even Ella got frozen out later. Except for possibly Olga A, even those relationships that started out friendly and warm, like with Xenia, seem to cool as the years went on and those that were pretty bad from the start just got worse.
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: ashanti01 on July 02, 2006, 04:47:10 PM
I remember reading that Sandro (Xenia's husband) believed that Alix began to grow distant and cold towards them when they started having boy after boy, while she was trying deseperatly to have a boy. I also believe that Alix wasn't thrilled when rumors started flowing about Xenia's and Sandro's matrial problems and extramatrial affairs on both their parts.

From all accounts Alix did not have an easy relationship with her in laws. She felt they were all quick to judge her and speaking about her behind her back.
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: grandduchessella on July 02, 2006, 05:37:58 PM
It would be understandable if she did. How painful would it have been to see your sister-in-law have son after son when you were having girls?  Plus, all Xenia's sons were healthy whereas Alix's long-desired son was so gravely ill?  :( It would be a natural reaction, plus there could be some guilt for feeling that way about someone that you cared about. Probably easier to just distance yourself. Sad though, since Xenia was one of the few Romanovs who got along with Alix.
Title: Re: Alexandra and Her Sisters-In-Law
Post by: Hector on January 16, 2012, 09:39:59 AM
Forgot one of her sisters-in-law although I'm unsure if they ever meet face-to-face. I have guesses on how Empress Alexandra felt towards Countess Brasova (http://forum.alexanderpalace.org/index.php?topic=61.0) and the other way around, but folks here known what (if anything) has been written about it?

(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/5/58/Brasova.jpg)