Or, Why Being a Woman Is Harder, and Always Has Been Harder, than Being A Man.
Unless that's too controversial. lol
While reading Vorres' The Last Grand Duchess (for the third time), a paradox occurred to me I found very interesting.
Empress Alexandra has been criticised (at the very least, if not outright vilified) for her wish to remain private and spend as much time with her family, and her family alone, as possible. Much of the criticism has to do with "not doing her job" as Empress - hating the social scene, not wanting to appear in public, and all that. To say nothing of the fact that she couldn't tolerate what she saw as Russian society's overindulgence and emptyheadedness.
In contrast, Empress Marie was touted for her finesse in this arena. She was a brilliant entertainer, social butterfly, the It Girl, if you will. She spent time with her children as well, but that was worked into her social schedule.
AF's children adored her, that fact is undisputed. MF's children loved her, as well, but there was a rift between herself and her daughter Olga, a feeling that her approval was necessary even into adulthood, and a general lack of comfort with being their "true" selves around her.
So, basically, what stands today, is what stood for that time, in this family. Working mothers are inferior parents, while dedicated mothers can't do a decent job outside the home.
This debate will never, ever be resolved, and I don't intend to turn this thread into a debate for which is better. I suppose it's just yet another example of what women continue to face.