It's interesting, isn't it? The double standards of a culture.
Alexandra didn't waste money on lots of fine clothes, jewels and throwing massive parties. Instead, she focussed on building hospitals and such, trying to improve the conditions of the masses, and for that, she was hated by the aristocracy, and she was also hated by the people.
To be fair, I think whatever Alexandra did, she wouldn't have been liked. She was damned if she did go to all the court functions (she would have been labelled as extravagant, uncaring, etc, as she was when she went to the ball after the Kodynka (sp?) field disaster after the coronation), and she was damned when she didn't and focussed on improving the lot of the average people (she was cold, she was proud, she was haughty, etc). I think the court had it out for Alexandra from the beginning. She was the 'funeral' bride, she pushed out Marie, who everyone loved, and she didn't like the way of life in St Petersburg. To the people she was the haughty German, even though she was trying to help them. Nothing she ever did was right.
Yes, Alexandra should have been more of a socialite, but it wasn't in her make up to do so. She was shy and she found it hard. She should have tried harder to get over this, seeing as it was her job to go to functions, but she didn't. However, like I say, I find it hard to believe that she would have been accepted and liked if she had done so anyway. The court seemed to be determined to dislike Alexandra, no matter what she did. And so did the people. What I find particularly interesting is that no one was ever bothered about Marie's foreign nationality, but it was a HUGE deal when it came to Alexandra. Russia had had German Tsarinas for generations; why was all the blame put on Alexandra's head? Because she was an easy scapegoat, that's why, and it seems to me that she was used as one from the very beginning.
I don't admire Alexandra that much, but I do think she was treated abominably when there was no real reason to do so.
Rachel
xx