Having now finished reading Olga Nikolaievna 's 1913 diary, I feel she certainly cared very much for AKSH and dear S . But imo part of what is driving these relationships is Olga had to have at least the possibility at of an highly charged unscheduled event for her to feel at her best. Olga Nicholaievna loved a surprise , the unexpected. She loved the emotional charge found in such a happening. But Olga Nikolaievna was a Grand Duchess, a royal, and she could basically know where she would be and what she would be doing for years ahead. It seems with maturity, Olga's love of school room pranks gave way to officer flirtations as a means to find some variance . No wonder she was often using those field glasses, looking for the current favortie. Just sighting them was a relief.
There is a time near the end of the diary where officer "dear S. " drops from her radar and for a time no one really takes up the slack. AKSH shows a couple of times, the must see favortie from earlier in her diary, but it's not the same. This when we read her life is " the same people doing the same stuff". ( Quite an admission for her, even though it has occurred to many a reader well before!) During this time Olga even says she feels " empty". But after awhile, Olga reports she has at least gotten use to not seeing dear S. This is quite a victory for her , given the contrast between her nature and position. Luckly dear S. returns and all is well ....for a time, but his marriage is something that takes place off the 1913 stage.
Like others, I want to greatly thank Raegan Baker and Marina Petrov for Olga 's 1913 diary and look forward to more!
