Alicky did not have a good relationshipship with Miechen at all. When the elder woman tried to guide the young empress, she was rebuffed. Miechen did hold this as a grude against Alicky (especially she did not like her English background). For Xenia, Alicky moved further away as she produced more sons, while she could only produced only daughters. Even Greek Minny felt Alicky was jealous when she talked with her husband of their happy days in Fredenborg. The Black pearls (Montenegran Princesses), their feud with Alicky due to Rasputin was too well known.
Isn't it extraordinary that in a family packed with such paragons of diplomacy, wisdom and even native intellect as Miechen, Maria Georgievna and Xenia Alexandra was even given the time of day?
Leaving aside the fact that the story about Miechen's gracious attempts to guide the young Empress (by encouraging her to slag off her mother-in-law, apparently) comes from Catherine Radziwill, a source you councilled others to avoid, the theatre incident during the mourning period for Alexander III hardly sets her up as a woman to be emulated by one seeking to understand the ways of the court, does it?
Maria Georgievna was not noted for her own sweet relationsip with the Romanovs or Russia, which she sought to be away from as much as she could. Given this, do you think that Alexandra knew her well? Are you aware that people who didn't know Nicholas also left accounts of reserved, "cold" or simply off-hand behaviour which stand in contrast to the adoring reminiscences of his female cousins? Sre you aware of the many aconts of Alexandra being gracious to freinds or strangers, and do you judge her by those too? - I wouldn't base my assessment of a person on either collection of short impressions or incidents, still less think still less think I could deduce their feelings or thoughts from them.
And since Alexandra certainly left no letters in which she said, "oh that bitch Xenia; I wish I could have some boys as well; I think I'll stop inviting her around here until she learns her place," the notion that Alexnadra felt "jealousy" for her sister-in-law's quiverful of sons is conjecture at best. there are plenty of other explanations for the apparent distancing between her and Xenia over the eyars (which by the wya is less apparanet in A's own letters than in Xenia's.) Perhaps Xenia's notion taht Alexandra's ailments were all in the mind - when A had herself noted a connection between her son's illness and her own health - may have played their role. Don't let's forget that in 1905 Xenia and Sandro considered running away.
The point of all this is to say: that the breakdown in Alexandra's relationship with some members of the family is something taht occurred over years and was a story with two sides - like most stories. It was not the in-born hatred of an unreasonable woman for her husband's warm and welcoming relatives who only wanted to be her friends. Back in the days when she and Melitsa were friends, remember, Alexandra was considered odd because the rest of the family looked down their noses at the Montenegrins.
I enjoy this sort of exchange hugely or I wouldn't keep coming back.....
