Richard Hough, who was the first biographer to have complete access to the archives at Broadlands, not to mention extensive interviews with family members, has the following to say in his book "Louis and Victoria, the family history of the Mountbattens".
"Victoria's family weremuch less pleased at the way things were going. As the eldest daughter and so soon after the death of her mother, they considered that her first duty was to her father and to her younger brother and sisters. At nineteen she was, they considered, too young and inexperienced for marriage.
This disapproval extended outside the family, and especially to the Imperial Families in Berlin and St Petersburg. Uncle Fritz and his eldest boy Willy (still smarting form the rebuff at Ella's hands) and the new Tsar Alexander III andthe Tsarina Marie Feodorovna, and a whole multitude of Grnad Dukes and Grand Duchesses, Princes and Princesses, and other minor royals, all thought it quite unsuitable that anyone as grand as Victoria should marry into this morganatic sub-branch of the Hessian family.
Louis's adopted nationality was against him, too, for England was popular neither with Prussia nor Russia...."
He also has this to say on p127
"Victoria said nothing in her letter to the Queen (Victoria) about the series of events that detracted form the glories of the Royal Wedding (Ella's). These she would recount to her personally later because the security of the Russian mails was not be trusted. These events, noticed by all but especially affecting her family, related to matters of precedence - a subject of the greatest delicacy and importance among thosethat lived by it. In England it was comparatively relaxed in Germany as stiff as anywhere,in Russia scarcely less stiff.
The Russian Court had determined to put Louis inhis place and demonstrate, as only the manipulation of precedence could, their disapproval of him and his marriage."
"Louis enteerd the banqueting hall with Victoria and her family fromthe Malachite Room in the Palace. Along with the other guests, they were then led in turn to their seats. To his astonishment, Louis found himself taken far down the table to the section reserved for the Osborne's officers, where he was placed below the captain. Mortified but helpless, Louis took his seat, and no doubt covered up his indignation by talking to his fellow Naval officers in the most natural manner."
"It was all the same a great insult, and the Grand Duke later took up the matter with the Tsar who agreed that it had indeed been unfortunate but after 'what he had heard form Belin he could not place him with the family'"
Later he goes on to write on p133 that in 1885
"Their (Louis and Victoria's) relations with the Russians were not good, and this was a great sadness for Victoria who deeply missed her sister Ella."