Grand Duke Ernst Ludwig & Grand Duchess Victoria Melita

[Helen]

The details I found went a bit further than just him having a male relationship.

Victoria Melita was criticized by the people of Hesse because her frequent abscences from Darmstadt did not go unnoticed. The point I was making in post #270 was that Ernst Ludwig's popularity had little to do with responsibility for the success or failure of his first marriage and that Ernst Ludwig was  popular with his people, not only because of what he did in Hesse, but also because of what he did not do in Hesse: it seems his compromising activities took place in Italy, out of sight of his people.

[Eric_Lowe]

I think VM suffered as she seemed to hate living a lie. For EL it is easier for him to live a double life. Missy wrote in her memoirs that even as a child her sister was honest and stubborn. That is why when her second husband betrayed her, it killed her. Onor was more suited to EL, since she did not care his "private life" and concentrate on the children and public role as Grand Duchess of Hesse.

[Thomas_Hesse]

Even if it is treu what was written about those "parties": the public certainly did not know about it. And I don't think that it was done as openly that VM would notice it.
Later memoirs are much exaggerated. And above all the reports about a rude and selfish and inappropriate behavior of the Grand Duchess are countless

[Romanov_fan]

I don't think it's true that VM wrecked both of her marriages. In my opinion, she and Ernest were both young and just not a good match. It was an arranged marriage that didn't work out. VM was obviously not as laid back as Ernest's second wife, but I wouldn't say it's true she wrecked the marriage by herself either. As for Kyril, and his marriage to VM, we don't know what happened to make it sour towards the end. We know more about why the marriage of Ernest and VM went sour.

[Eric_Lowe]

I have much sympathy for VM, who was forced into a marriage with no idea what love was. If the shattering of dreams was hard on the more pragmatic Missy, it would be even harder on the idealistic VM. The letters she wrote to Missy prior to her eventual divorce made hard reading. Many times she wanted to pin EL down and achieve a kind of link, EL always manage to be elusive to her much to her distress. It would seemed that apart from pouring her heart out to her favourite sister, she could only rebel aginst the status quo by escaping from the scene of the crime. VM lost herself in riding and suffered bouts of depression, which manifest itself by refusing to do what was expected of her and rude. It was really childish, but what could she have done in such a trapped situation. She felt trapped and long to break free.

[po3a]

VM isn't someone that I admire.  But, I must say I am impressed with her.  She was a strong confidant woman---maybe it was because her grandparents on both sides were two of the most important people on the planet.  At a time when women had few rights and rules were not suppose to be broken she took her life into her own hands! I have to respect that... Ernie, wow, what can you say about him...such a tragic life.  If he was gay---well, being gay in Victorian times not easy. He had so much loss in his life. I find both of these individuals lives very interesting---a movie should be made!

[Eric_Lowe]

Ducky would have reverted back to Princess Victoria Melita of Edinbrugh/Coburg after her divorce. She did not became Grand Duchess until she married Kyril.

[Thomas_Hesse]

Ernie, wow, what can you say about him...such a tragic life.  If he was gay---well, being gay in Victorian times not easy. He had so much loss in his life.

Guess there is a bit more to say about Ernst Ludwig's life than that =) an exceptional personality

[Eric_Lowe]

You can never be sure one is totally gay or bisexual in those days.

[Svetabel]

You can never be sure one is totally gay or bisexual in those days.

Seems it's your favourite theme. There are a lot of themes to discuss except that vivid question.

[Eric_Lowe]

I think that was one of the reasons why Ducky felt she couldn't bond with Ernie.

[Royski]

I am new to this forum, but not new to reading about Royalty.  Can anyone suggest any good books that discuss Ernest and Victoria Meltia's marriage and the breakup?
I believe Helen talked about some books that talked about Ernest's affairs in Italy back on Oct.27, 2009, but she doesn't say which books or who the author was.
Thank you in advance for any assistance with this.

[Eric_Lowe]

There is quite a few books:

1. Fatal Attraction: A bio on Ducky that included life before and after her divorce from Ernie and marriage to Cyril
2. Victoria Melita: The bio on Ducky by John Van Der Kiste
3. My life in Russia's Service. The autobio of Grand Duke Cyril of Russia, second husband of Ducky.
4. The Story of my life. The auto biography of Ducky's sister Queen Marie of Romania. Covers their life as children.
5. Russian Memories. The memoirs of Merial Buchanan, who knew Ducky personally in Hesse and later in Russia.

[grandduchessella]

I would add Hessian Tapestry by David Duff. If memory serves, the treatment of the divorce was pretty even-handed but it's been awhile. A Fatal Passion (not Fatal Attraction) was very pro-Victoria Melita. The Van Der Kiste was pretty just-the-facts-ma'am. Obviously Cyril's bio wouldn't dwell on the divorce, or his part, too heavily.

[Eric_Lowe]

Hessian Tavesry did not have too much on Ducky though.