As a sentimental and romantic teenager, projecting all my passions and waitings on “my friends from the Heaven”, as I used to call at that time the Grand-duchesses, I felt myself closer to Olga Nikolaevna. Some times after this, growing up, becoming an adult, when my interest for the Imperial family became more religious and more historical, the figure, the personality of Tatiana began imposing to me, became more important, and my interest for the second daughter of the last tsar grew and grew.
Some people of her time say she has something of a male, that it would be better for her to be born as a boy. For my part, I see Tatiana Nikolaevna as a complete lady in becoming, as a real young lady.
Of course, she was graceful, beautiful, was charming people, and even today, on a lot of casual shots we can feel this grace. I admire her grace, I like her beauty. Tatiana was sensitive, as her sister and friend Olga. She had also a loving heart, she was thirsty of love and friendship. She felt pain for poor people, for wounded. But she seems to have had a great quality, she never let her passions capture her, being more than her. Feelings, passions and compassions did not “ate” her heart, but pushed her to be more luminous. I like it, I admire it.
Lanie made a very interesting remark, about the way Tatiana could “manipulate” her mother. I see here an other quality. As it seems to me (I can make a mistake), she “felt” people, her father, her mother, other people, she could find the “key” of people, and used it for her interest, the interest of her sisters, of her family. She could change the things without “fighting”. I think it is the reason why her parents sent Tatiana and not the other to, for example, Yourovsky. I like this quality, which has nothing to do with hypocrisy, I admire it. And it tell me that Tatiana was more intelligent as it used to be said.
Tatiana was a deep orthodox believer, and not only for to be agreable to her mother. She read a lot, she had a lot of books about her faith. She prayed, liturgical life was part of her own life. I admire her faith, I like her searching deeper.
Tatiana was a joyceful girl. She liked joking, she had a beautiful smile, she laughed and played with her sisters, even when the moment were very serious. I admire her joyce even in such a place as a lazaret, I like Tatiana smiling and laughing.
Tatiana was very responsable. I see her as a Mater familias, calm and great. I admire her, forgotting about herself, I like this young girl taking responsability of her family in Tobolsk.
Well, for all these reasons, and for others I certainly forgot, I admire and like the "real Tatiana", as called her Lili Dehn. Hum, I hope it is understandable...
